Of course Elon has tapped @johnconner2046 to plan the welcome back party for the astronauts returning on Crew Dragon Freedom in the Gulf of Mexico. He has a dual function- he also has to make sure they haven't been infected with some kind of Astronauts Wife/Venom/Body Snatchers-like alien symbiotic organism. This hasn't become a Hollywood trope for no reason. It took 2 weeks to extract the creature that had infected Buzz Aldrin.
In honor of @johnconner2046 , some Dad jokes John tells astronauts and some memes
Why are there not more dog astronauts?
They’re afraid of the vacuum.
Why do all astronauts use a mac?
Because its dangerous to open windows in space.
On my first day at astronaut training, I vomited and asked the instructor, “Is this normal?”
He said, “Not during a written exam, no.”
Mark has officially put in a request for a Yule log.
Calling all bakers—does anyone have a TRULY foolproof recipe? And I mean foolproof-foolproof. 😅
I’ll be choosing one brave (and lucky) recipe to attempt this weekend before the kids arrive.
The winner gets eternal gratitude… and Gutfeld! merch as a bonus prize!
Help me avoid a holiday baking disaster.😬
“Influence”
Well, we’ve hit a milestone, all 4 of my children are now home owners. The prodigal and his lovely bride went to closing yesterday. He’s the last one to buy a house.
I just ordered 2 different kettlebells for my son in law, a 12kg (22 lbs) and a 16kg (35 lbs). He requested kettlebells for Christmas.
“Find significance within yourself. Within your own sphere of power–that is where you have the greatest consequence.”
— Epictetus
Picture: this one taken by ‘My Buddy Bob’ is one of my favorites.
Uno declared “It looks like an album cover!”
