Of course Elon has tapped @johnconner2046 to plan the welcome back party for the astronauts returning on Crew Dragon Freedom in the Gulf of Mexico. He has a dual function- he also has to make sure they haven't been infected with some kind of Astronauts Wife/Venom/Body Snatchers-like alien symbiotic organism. This hasn't become a Hollywood trope for no reason. It took 2 weeks to extract the creature that had infected Buzz Aldrin.
In honor of @johnconner2046 , some Dad jokes John tells astronauts and some memes
Why are there not more dog astronauts?
They’re afraid of the vacuum.
Why do all astronauts use a mac?
Because its dangerous to open windows in space.
On my first day at astronaut training, I vomited and asked the instructor, “Is this normal?”
He said, “Not during a written exam, no.”
Mark dragged down his Chewbacca from upstairs and wore his favorite mask for Halloween. No negativity surprisingly…. ! He did, however, pay a visit to the liberal house next door and repeatedly yelled, “You’re fired! You’re fired! You’re fired!” I think they actually enjoyed it.
Send help......and a storage unit. He kept the m'fer a secret. Maybe I should come home with a pair of $1000 shoes.
Congratulation to @SGKusmertz, @bek1, and @wilbner. Your questions were chosen for tonight’s Ask Joe and the Panelists.
@SGKusmertz If you could have one song play when you enter a room, what would it be?
@bek1 Do you usually feel excited or stressed out about going back to school after summer break?
@wilbner What was the best prank you’ve ever pulled?
Congratulations to @cat-head. Your question was chosen for tonight’s Ask Greg and the Panelists.
What do you do to get yourself out of a mental funk?
As a Gutter Member we invite you to use the promo code 27GGLIVE starting at 10am local time today for access to Pre-Sale Tickets. If you have any issues with the ticket links please use the official ticket links from www.GGUTFELD.com - We look forward to seeing you at the show!
3.13.27 - Old Nationals Event Center – Evansville, IN
Ticket link: https://www.ticketmaster.com/event/0500655B96A139BB
3.14.27 Palace Theatre – Columbus, OH
Ticket link: https://tickets.capa.com/12375
4.24.27 Broward Center – Ft. Lauderdale, FL
http://www.ticketmaster.com/event/0D00655DA0255330?brand=broward
4.25.27 - DAR Hall – Washington, D.C
Ticket Link: https://www.ticketmaster.com/event/1500655DE03ADF02
6.12.27 - Rosemont Theatre – Rosemont, IL
Ticket link: https://www.ticketmaster.com/event/04006555A31F6474
6.13.27 KeyBank State Theatre – Cleveland, OH
Ticket Link: ...
