Newfoundland, Canada, declares war on the U.S.A!!!
President Trump was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang.
"Hallo, President Trump, " a heavily accented voice said. "This is
Archie, up ‘ere at the Harp Seal Pub in Badger's Cove, Newfoundland, Canada, eh?
I am callin' to tells ya dat we are officially declaring war on ya!"
"Well Archie," Donald said, "This is indeed important news! How big is
your army?" "Right now," said Archie, after a moments calculation "there is
myself, me cousin Harold , me next-door-neighbor Mick, and the whole dart team from the pub. That makes eight!"
Donald paused. "I must tell you Archie that I have one million men in my army
waiting to move on my command."
"Wow," said Archie. "I'll have at call ya back!"
Sure enough, the next day, Archie called again. "Mr. Trump, the war is still on!
We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment! We have two combines,
a bulldozer, and Harry 's farm tractor."
President Trump sighed. "I must tell you Archie, that I have 16,000 tanks and
14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a
half million since we last spoke."
"Lord above," said Archie, "I'll be getting back to ya."
Sure enough, Archie rang again the next day.. "President Trump, the
war is still on! We have managed to git ourselves airborne! We up an' modified
Harrigan's ultra-light wit a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four boys from the Legion have joined us as well!"
Donald was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I must
tell you Archie that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Jumpins, Lord tunderin! Two million, ye say!!" said Archie, l'll have at call youse back."
Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "President Trump! I am
sorry to have to tell you dat we have had to call off dis 'ere war."
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Donald. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
“Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long
chat over a bunch of pints, and come to realize dat dere's no way we can feed
two million prisoners."
Mornin a tad early.
Helping people impacted by Helene. Led and coordinated all the logistics to make this happen……let’s hope they get in
Look what just flew in. I'm still outside looking at the gutter and then this guy landed on the lawn about twenty feet in front of me. I shut down the computer, tried to adjust for the darkness and waited. He flew to the pond and drank heavily. pretty sure it's an owl. Hawks do not hunt at night. He hung out for about 2 minutes or so. I cut the video so not too long.
Back home after a long 3 days of disaster preparedness. I keep talking and he wants to sleep.
Congratulations to @jennybadger2 your question was chosen for Gutfeld!
Here’s the winning question:
Have you ever had a ghostly experience?
Sidenote. I kind of agree with Tyrus. It might be Elena. Greg has too many tshirts.
