A woman decided to have a face lift for her birthday.
She spent $5000 and felt really good about the results.
On her way home she stopped at a dress shop to look around.
As she was leaving, she said to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 35,"he replied.
"I'm actually 47," the woman said, feeling really happy.
After that she went into McDonald's for lunch and asked the order taker the same question.
He replied, "Oh, you look about 29."
"I am actually 47!" she said, feeling really good.
While standing at the bus stop she asked an old man the same question.
He replied, "I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a woman's age. If I put my hand up your skirt I will be able to tell your exact age."
There was no one around, so the woman said, "What the hell?" and let him slip his hand up her skirt.
After feeling around for a while, the old man said, "OK, You are 47."
Stunned, the woman said, "That was brilliant! How did you do that?"
The old man replied, "I was behind you in line at McDonald's."
Mornin.
I will post pictures of the final product soon, after I wiped the grease off my phone.
@derrickhhurd what is the formula of your success? How has it changed over the years?
“I’m sitting in the middle”
Of a freak show.
Also known as an ‘Emergency Room’ waiting area.
My ever-beautiful soulmate is experiencing ‘Bradycardia’, or extremely low pulse.
She had an episode yesterday wherein she was disoriented and had tingling in her face. It was shortly after she’d taken her blood pressure meds, ergo we assumed that to be the cause. I made her lie down and she seemed to improve.
Today, she made an appointment to see her physician to check if it was her blood pressure meds, as she has lost around 35 lbs since it was first prescribed.
Since it was just a few miles away, she took herself.
Approximately an hour later, she called and told me to get a ride to the doctor’s office to take her to the emergency room. As she had driven ‘The Dude’. They had made her promise to go straight to the hospital or they would call an ambulance.
They may make her stay the night because they may need to install a pacemaker.
I hope it’s that simple.
