A woman decided to have a face lift for her birthday.
She spent $5000 and felt really good about the results.
On her way home she stopped at a dress shop to look around.
As she was leaving, she said to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 35,"he replied.
"I'm actually 47," the woman said, feeling really happy.
After that she went into McDonald's for lunch and asked the order taker the same question.
He replied, "Oh, you look about 29."
"I am actually 47!" she said, feeling really good.
While standing at the bus stop she asked an old man the same question.
He replied, "I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a woman's age. If I put my hand up your skirt I will be able to tell your exact age."
There was no one around, so the woman said, "What the hell?" and let him slip his hand up her skirt.
After feeling around for a while, the old man said, "OK, You are 47."
Stunned, the woman said, "That was brilliant! How did you do that?"
The old man replied, "I was behind you in line at McDonald's."
Mornin.
Congratulations to @APalm, @Pam_Antosiak, @RockNRollHS. Your questions were chosen for tonight’s.Ask Greg and the Panelists.
@APalm Who's a celebrity that is universally considered attractive, but they just don't do it for you?
@Pam_Antosiak At your current level of professional success, do you still have a five year plan? And if you do, where do you want to be in five years?
@RockNRollHS What is it that annoys you the most these days?
Taped The Great Christmas Showdown at Fox and this weekend I’ll be with Greg in Atlantic City
I have a friend who has sex 3-4 times a week. Works out every day. And reads at least two books a week.
But all this guy ever does is complain about prison.
Mornin
GRATITUDE CIRCLE 🌎
I am grateful for another day in America.
I am grateful for freedom and our Constitution.
I am grateful to see that some of the bad players from the former administration are being investigated for their crimes.
Namaste as you journey through your day - 🌞 - it's National Cake Day
Well, how about that -
While a British rock band made his name famous nearly 300 years after his birth, Jethro Tull (1664 – 1741) was renowned in his own right as an agricultural pioneer and the inventor of the seed drill, the horse-drawn hoe, and an improved plough, all major developments in the agricultural revolution. Tull's methods helped to provide the basis for modern agriculture. The progressive rock band Jethro Tull took their name after the 18th-century agriculturalist. The name proved to be popular and memorable, and it stuck.
