The Gutter
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last saturdays monologue in script form.

i always like sharing these so you see how these things look to me:

LOOK WHO'S BACK....

((PAUSE FOR SOT!!!))

I guess you can use a snappy slogan like defund the police, but you lost a big audience the minute you say it, which makes it a lot less likely that you're actually going to get the changes you want done
//
The key is deciding, do you want to actually get something done, or do you want to feel good among the people you already agree with

((FS IN BOX))
JUST WHAT THE MEDIA WANTED: PROOF THAT THE DEMOCRATS AREN'T AS INSANE AS ITS SQUAD OF FAR LEFT CLICK-BAIT TROLLS.

IT'S B.S - THEY'RE NOT SPLIT ON THE AGENDA, JUST THE WORDS. IT'S ABOUT WHAT THEY CAN PULL OVER ON YOU.

OBAMA WASN'T SAYING POLICE DEFUNDING WAS BAD.

HE WAS SAYING YOU NEED TO LIE ABOUT IT BETTER.

((VO IN BOX))
JUST DON'T CALL IT DEFUNDING THE POLICE.

CALL IT REROUTING THE BUDGET!
when IT'S REALLY DECRIMINALIZING CRIME.

((ON CAM))
DON’T YOU REMEMBER THEIR OLD CLASSICS?

WHEN TERRORISM BECAME WORKPLACE VIOLENCE!

ILLEGAL ALIENS BECAME UNDOCUMENTED CITIZENS.

AND MORONS - BECAME CNN VIEWERS.

((VO IN BOX))
ANYWAY, IT'S NOT LIKE OBAMA WAS EVER AGAINST DEFUNDING, OR - AS JESSE WATTERS POINTED OUT IN A RARE MOMENT OF INSIGHT - HE COULD'VE MENTIONED IT WHEN IT WAS HAPPENIG!

BUT MAYBE HE WAS TOO BUSY WRITING HIS 12TH MEMOIR. BECAUSE THOSE OCEANSIDE MANSIONS AREN'T GUNNA HEAT THEMSELVES.

((ON CAM))
MEANWHILE - AS OBAMA'S PUMPING A BOOK, BILL CLINTON'S, PUMPING... WHO KNOWS.

((FS IN BOX))
HIS LONG TIME RIGHTHAND MAN DOUG BAND DOES, AND TOLD VANITY FAIR THAT BILL INDEED VISITED EPSTEIN'S SOCALLED PEDOPHILE ISLAND. OR AS A DEMOCRAT MIGHT CALL IT, AN UNDOCUMENTED BIRD SANCTUARY.

OR AN UNCHARTED SAFEHOUSE FOR NUBILE REFUGEES

BILL'S DENIED IT, BUT IT'S NOT LIKE HE'S EVER LIED ABOUT SEX.

((VO IN BOX))
AND OF COURSE THERE'S JOE. SNIFFING AROUND TRUMP'S PAST ACHIEVEMENTS, TO CALL HIS OWN. AFTER YEARS OF CONDEMNING 'AMERICA FIRST' AS XENOPHOBIC - WHAT'S HIS NEW PLATFORM? AMERICA FIRST. TELLING THE TIMES HE WON'T ENTER ANY NEW TRADE DEAL UNTIL WE INVEST IN AMERICA FIRST..

((ON CAM))
ALREADY, DEMS AND THE MEDIA APPLAUD THIS BOLD MOVE - THE SAME BOLD MOVE THEY DEEMED RACIST JUST MONTHS AGO. INCLUDING THIS FELLA.

((PAUSE FOR SOT!!!))
MSNBC
MAY 1
BIDEN: America first has made America alone under the Trump Administration. Our alliances are in jeopardy.com//
ABC NEWS
OCTOBER 15
BIDEN: We’re more isolated in the world than we've ever been. Our allies are our goal alone. Our America first has made America alone//
NBC NEWS
NOVEMBER 25
BIDEN: President Trump has changed the landscape. It's become America first which meant America alone.

((FS IN BOX))
MAYBE HE FORGOT! IT'S NORMAL. EVERY DAY HIS STAFF HAS TO DECLARE A LID ON HIS PANTS.

the other day he was asked about disagreeing with Kamala Harris.

I MEAN, WHAT THE HELL DOES THIS MEAN.

((PAUSE FOR SOT!!!))

((FS IN BOX))
IT'S FUNNY CUZ ITS TRUE!

BUT IT'S GUNNA BE FUN TO SEE HOW MUCH OF TRUMP'S ACHIEVEMENTS BIDEN'S GUNNA KEEP, SINCE THEY ALL WORKED.

((ON CAM))
THE TARIFFS. THE PEACE PLANS, OPERATION WARP SPEED.

((FS IN BOX))
JOE'S LUCKY.

TRUMP'S SET IT UP SO EVEN A HAPLESS DEMOCRAT COULD SUCCEED.

((ON CAM))
SPEAKING OF MR. TRUMP... THIS MAY BE THE MOST IMPORTANT SPEECH HE'S EVER MADE.

((PAUSE FOR SOT!!!))
trt: 22
Trump: This may be the most important speech I've ever made. I want to provide an update on our ongoing efforts to expose the tremendous voter fraud and irregularities which took place during the ridiculously long November 3rd elections// if we are right about the fraud. Joe Biden can't be president

((FS IN BOX))
THERE ARE 2 COUNTERARGUMENTS AGAINST FRAUD: THE ACCUSATIONS ARE BASELESS, AND THERE'S NO EVIDENCE OF WIDESPREAD FRAUD. THE FIRST ONE IS WRONG. THE SECOND ONE, POINTLESS.

((ON CAM))
FIRST, EVERY ATTACK ON CIVIL SOCIETY DEFENDED BY THE LEFT REMINDS US THAT THEY BELIEVE LAWLESSNESS IS ACCEPTABLE.

((VO IN BOX))
SO RIOTS BECAME MOSTLY PEACEFUL. LOOTING'S DEEMED LEGITIMATE PROTEST. POLITICIANS ENCOURAGE PEOPLE TO CONFRONT LAW ABIDING CITIZENS. CARS WERE MOBBED. HOMES VANDALIZED.

SO WHAT'S A LITTLE ELECTION FRAUD,?

WHEN YOU CLAIM TO LEAD A MORAL CRUSADE AGAINST EVIL, THAT'S NOTHING.

((VO IN BOX))
AND SO YOU HAVE BULLYING FROM A MORAL HIGH GROUND ATOP A HEAP OF DUNG. HARASSMENT BECOMES AN OBLIGATION, CUZ YOU BIGOTS DESERVE IT.

((ON CAM))
MEANWHILE THE SAME FOOLS WHO THOUGHT SILLY MEMES FROM RUSSIAN TROLL FARMS COULD THROW AN ELECTION - NOW DISMISS ACTUAL EYEWITNESSES.

LIKE THESE PEOPLE.

((PAUSE FOR SOT!!!))

MONTAGE OF EYEWITNESSES
Ballots were being duplicated in mass by 3 democrat poll workers at a time. Where was the oversight in that?//the ballot had a straight party ticket vote for both the democrat and the republican. // the poll worker then said, I think I’m gonna give it to the democrats. That is absolutely absurd. That is illegal//I was told I wasn't allowed within 6 feet of the tables even to verify ballots and told that I was trying to kill people// This is their address that they show on the voter registration card. This is a church of which it is illegal to register to vote anywhere but at your home address

((FS IN BOX))
NOW SOME COULD BE EXAGGERATING OR EXPRESSING AN OPINION. BUT A LOT SOUNDED LEGIT, AND THEY SIGNED SWORN AFFIDAVITS, WHICH IS MEANINGFUL.

((ON CAM))
NOW: WHAT IF WE SAID NOTHING.

OR JUST SAID, "YEAH, THIS LOOKS BAD, BUT FRAUD IS HARD TO PROVE AND THE ELECTIONS GOTTA BE CERTIFIED IN WEEKS."

TRUE.

((FS IN BOX))
BUT THE MULLER PROBE LASTED TWO YEARS, BORN FROM A FAKE DOSSIER.

((ON CAM))
MEANWHILE THIS MURKY ELECTION GETS JUST A MONTH OF SCRUTINY - WHICH IS RIDICULED BY THE SAME MEDIA WHO GOBBLED UP THE RUSSIA HOAX FOR 4 YEARS.

WE HAVE TO SAY SOMETHING.

CUS IF WE SAID NOTHING - WOULD THE LEFT EVER CARE WHEN THEY CROSS A LINE?

((VO IN STACKS))
THEY DIDN'T WHEN MOBBING CITIZENS, RIOTING IN PORTLAND. LOOTING IN MINNEAPOLIS.

WHEN THE PERSONAL IS POLITICAL THE MOB RULES.

SO YOU GOTTA SPEAK UP.

IF NOT FOR NOW; FOR LATER.

((VO IN BOX))
AS FOR THE CLAIM THAT THERE'S NO WIDESPREAD FRAUD.

FINE: YOU DON'T NEED IT.

"WIDESPREAD FRAUD" IS AS STUPID A PHRASE AS "MOSTLY PEACEFUL."

((ON CAM))
YOU ONLY NEED JUST A HANDFUL OF DEMOCRATIC CITIES RIOTING AND LOOTING TO UPEND A SOCIETY.

LIKEWISE YOU ONLY NEED SPECIFIC POCKETS OF TARGETED CHEATING IN CRUCIAL COUNTIES TO CHANGE AN ELECTION.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO SPIKE EVERY BOTTLE OF PAIN RELIEVERS TO PARALYZE AN INDUSTRY.

SO THE KEY QUESTION IS WHETHER THERE WAS CHEATING IN SPECIFIC PLACES THAT CHANGED THE OUTCOME.

WE HAVE WITNESSES WHO SAY YES. MAYBE THEY'RE MISTAKEN.

MAYBE THEY'RE NOT. THEY'RE RISKING A LOT.

REMEMBER THE DEMOCRATS IMPEACHED THE PRESIDENT CUZ THEY HAD direct evidence! "a WHISTELBLOWER!"

YOU CAN THANK SCHIFF FOR THAT.

((PAUSE FOR SOT!!!))

Todd: You have seen direct evidence of collusion? Schiff: uh...I don't want to go into specifics but I will say that there is evidence that is not circumstantial...and is very much worthy of investigation".

((ON CAM))
AND REMEMBER THOSE PROFESSIONAL WITNESSES LINED UP TO DESTROY BRETT CAVANAUGH?

THEY WERE WELL COACHED AND ADORED BY THE MEDIA.

((FS IN BOX))
THE SAME MEDIA WHO EMBRACED QUESTIONABLE TYPES LIKE MICHAEL COHEN, SCARAMUCCI AND AMOROSA.

((ON CAM))
AND NOW THEY IGNORE THESE WHISTLEBLOWERS?

WHY?

WELL, OF THE 4 PRESIDENTS IN THE NEWS, THERE'S ONLY ONE THE PRESS HATES.

THAT TELLS YOU EVERYTHING.

((PAUSE FOR PERIOD NEXIO!!!))

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We’re in CaHOOTS

For those of you who are interested, the owls have returned to last year’s nest. The neighbors are so thrilled!! I’m being a tad sarcastic. I caught one flying to the window box Thursday evening and then to the tree in the video below. They moved all the fake flowers in the window box to make room for the growing family. No eggs yet. Just prep work.
As for my sarcasm, their daughter had to move out of her room last year due to all the owl noise. Her parents were thrilled to have a new roommate. And once the owls left the nest, they left a very disgusting, smelly mess.

00:00:15
Ask Greg Winning questions

Congratulations to @Fuezie and @KenLeeK. Your questions were chosen for tonight’s Ask Greg.

@Fuezie What’s your favorite sound that brings a smile to your face?

@KenLeeK What is the biggest fib you told as a kid?

00:03:27
ASK GREG WINNING QUESTION

Congratulations to @APalm. Your question was chosen for tonight’s Gutfeld!

@APalm What unrecognized or obscure group deserves to have its history recognized for a whole month?

00:03:13
ASK GREG WINNING QUESTION

Congratulations to @Benzie. Your question was chosen for tonight’s Gutfeld!

@Benzie If you could be on the cover of a magazine what magazine would you choose?

5 hours ago

Gonna need approval from @scoop60
You'll get there some day, @GregGutfeld , maybe before I find the right font. Until then, hope you like this VARIETY.

post photo preview

NEGATIVITY CART 🛒
Not one more penny for that stupid high speed train in Cali. Not one.
And somebody needs to have a talk with Stacey Abrams. In jail.

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